I recently watched a TED Talk about the importance of body language. The speaker stated that making yourself smaller (hunched back, arms folded (protecting yourself) makes you feel more insecure, and how making yourself bigger (arms stretched out, straight back) makes you feel confident. In other words, our body language affects how we feel about ourselves (see link below).
For most of my childhood, power posing wasn't exactly a part of my everyday life. On the contrary, I was making myself smaller. My posture wasn't the best (hunched back, folded arms and so on) Although I was told to improve it and one person even took a photo to show my posture to me, I still didn't change it.
My posture reflected how I felt inside; broken, scared, insecure, protective and afraid to trust others. Sometimes a person who is staring down into the ground doesn't just need help with body language, but with finding his/her internal power.
To change my display, I needed a change on the inside; knowledge that I was ok as I was, that I was good enough, safe, smart and attractive.
Head held high
I eventually got help in Spain and learnt to accept myself, and nowadays walking with my head held high comes naturally. I am determined to spend the rest of my life that way.
I love making power poses: fist in the air declaring I am strong; smiling at myself in the mirror telling myself that I am smart. It is not bragging. We were made in the image of excellence. These practices are essential to get to where you want to be. I know the power of talking down to oneself, and that is why I make the utmost to use words to feel good about myself.
While I agree with Amy Cuddy, the speaker, that how we carry ourselves affect how we feel, and that adopting a power posture to boost yourself up is useful, I also believe that true change, true confidence comes from the deep rooted conviction that I am perfectly fine as I am.
That conviction can only come when we accept ourselves, no give or take; the whole package just as we are right now. Then you are in true position of power.
Want to find out more about how you can improve your confidence? Click here I would love to help you be your best you!
To watch the TED Talk, click here.
All the best, xxx /Hermine